Disclaimer: BARE WITH ME! I'M HIGH IN SUGAR!! Ahem... like always... Ushio and Tora and Co. are a (c) to Kazuhiro Fujita and I own no one... it's a song/poem... since some one told me my poems are good, I just thought I'd post one... bear with me... R&R!!

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I open my eyes on that dawn...
But I still can't believe you're really gone...
I see your shadow there with your usual perch...
I say nothing, cause I know it's not real...
It's only the way I feel...

Your orange fur flickering within the sun...
Sparkling, shimmering... feeling it was so much fun...
Grabbing it tight while we flew...
Although I've been thought it constantly...
I still can't believe it was true...

Your silver eyes dance glaring while you laughter...
Your face showing so much...
Things I don't understand from you...
Yet I give you so much trust...

I have doubts about all what have happened...
Yet... every thing seemed to fit...
It was all so fast...
All so sudden...
I don't want to remember it...
But it's like a person I know...
Who is so stubborn...

So stubborn? I say...
I remember your words...
Echoing through my mind...
As loud as wildly running herds...

They run uncontrollably...
Making my mind run with thoughts...
The things we've done...
The things we've been through...
Were they nothing...
Nothing but thoughts?

No... this can't be...
My cut's and bruises prove the truth...
I've seen you there...
And I'm aware...
Every thing that happened...
Was actually true...

I move my hand to the empty space...
Where my weapon used to lay...
I miss its presents...
I miss its power...
But all I feel like doing... is to glare...


I got out of bed, towards my window...
Looking out side that sky...
The birds' fly...
The clouds soar...
Nothing is the same no more...
Or is it just my soul pinned to that cold-solid floor?

"Pinned to the floor?" I whisper...
"To a wall is more exact!" I murmur...
Remembering that first day...
The beast and I were seldom enemies...
"Aren't we?" I had to say...
Was it the truth?
Does it even matter?
It's just like the familiar sound...
Metal clatter...

"Their all gone now..." I whisper...
Heart in shades of pain...
But my tears would never drop...
"Never mind the pain..."

***

Walking out the silent rooms door...
Two feet on wooden-slot floor...
I look at my homes' rooftops...
There was nothing left to adore...
No silver eyes...
No orange mane...
Nothing to remember...
But heartless pain...

I shake my head as I walk down town...
Thing are just the same...
Same shops...
Same stands...
Same faces...
Same lands...

But then...
It came up to me...
Some thing I truly forgot...
Some thing was still within my soul...
Even if I no longer... had never fought...

I can still see other beasts...
The ones cute and harmless...
Walking among the human race...
Like ghosts... though some are truly charm-less...
I hold a smile and walk away...
I would not hunt them now...
They are no longer my pray...
No longer a hunter...
With no weapon no more...
Some thing keeps telling me...
"Go check that old basement door!"

"Get the hell out of my mind!" I growl...
People at me stare...
I hate it when that happens...
Especially when I'm aware!

***

I pass the restaurant...
But I don't feel hungry now...
Yet some thing keeps tells me...
"How about some chow?"
I shake my head...
I no longer eat there...

But then I saw her...
Working by her mother...
Her father always thought we fit together...
"Asako..." I breathe...
Feeling lonely and forgotten...
Yet a part of my soul makes me feel rotten...
"Too much blood on my hands..." I reason...
But to no avail...
I'd better be moving on my own railroad trail...

***

I'm back at my home... safe and sound...
I lay my self on that solid cold ground...
I feel alone...
I feel ashamed...
I have never felt such pain...
Such horror...
Too many to be even named...

"I am Aotsuki Ushio..." I whisper...
"Beast barrier or not..." I say...
"I have to carry on my life..." I breathe...
Trying to feel right...
Fighting the tears with all my might...
But they force them selves out...
Out of my control...
My world had vanished...
There is nothing left to thing about...

"Carry on my life..." a chuckle seeped out...
Tears streaming on my face...
"My father is dead... Tora's gone... the spear is smashed..." I hissed in the night...
"How the hell am I gonna be alright?"
I scold the air...
I swat curse and swear...
There is nothing left for me...
I am aware...
Every thing is gone...
I'm all alone...
What is left for me out there??
Nothing... and nothing...
Nothing that I would with some thing compare...
I cry though the night...
Eyes swell with heat...
I fall to my feet...
My breath in my chest...
Blocked with a mist...
I just need a comfort...
I shoulder to cry on...
Some thing...
Some one...

***

"Have I fallen asleep?" I think...
It's morning...
And I can see...
The window is open...
The breeze blew softly against my face...
But wait a minute...
I felt massive haste...
I hadn't opened the window!
And the room is not a mess...
Then how did I get so...

"Good morning Ushio!" a voice softly said...
"Asako!" I jilt... it was only my friend...
With a soft smile...
And a heart shaped face...
I couldn't help but blush...
Seeing her beautiful grace...
She looked so lovely...
So pure and fine...
"You know some thing..." I thought...
"I wouldn't 'mind' making her mine!"

"Are you alright?" she asked...
Voice calm and soft...
"You were asleep and crying when I found you last night..."
I feel burned in my face...
I dropped my gaze to my lap in shame...
I have been so weak... so childish...
It was life... a nasty game...
I played with fire...
And I lost every thing...
Now I am with a mere sad soul...
But to hold... I have nothing...

"Ushio!" she stated again...
Her face with a smile shimmering with care...
"Every thing is going to be alright, you'll see!"
She tried to make me feel better...
But all I could do...
Was stare...

"I know..." a word seeped out...
Though I doubt it truly...
I felt lost... frightened...
life could be so ugly...

With a sigh I glanced up at her...
She was aware... she knew my thoughts...
And I knew her glare...
"Don't lose hope Ushio! Got that!" she softly scolded...
Her knuckled on my scull...
"Keep that in mind!" she chuckled...
"What ever..." I said...
Okay... I thought...
Things may not be the same...
But as long as I'm alive...
I have to play this game...
It's life...
It's fate...
I win and lose...
It just depends...
On what choice...
You choose...

***
END...
***

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Disclaimer: I AM SO CRAZY I HATE MY SELF! I know the fic is missing a few strings, but I just didn't want to go too deep in the fic, cause I honestly 'have-no-idea' what happened before/though/after Ushio fought white face... I had a hunch of trying this... just tell me what you think... I'm not good in putting the right word in the right place... after all... I'm still not that happy with poems any way... R&R PPL!